Meryl's Notes Blog

A little LOST tribute there with wishes for my only bro. Tuesday, August 3, is older brother’s birthday. (I’m the youngest of three. Yes, I rub it in. Yes, he’s the father of the gal I mentioned last week.) Sending good vibes his way for another great year and many more.

Excited to wave good-bye to July as we enter the month that school starts up again! Was that too enthusiastic? I can’t help it — I like having a schedule and of course, I work better with the kids in school all day.

Anyhoo, back to work. Lots to do… so keeping this short.

Brain food…

• Create the Perfect Author Facebook Page: Captioned video! Just two minutes of your time.
• Think Small to Go Big: Sales for the Small Business Professional: Don’t overwhelm yourself. Great book on topic of starting small for all aspects of our lives: One Small Step Can Change Your Life: The Kaizen Way. Short, fast read. More short fast reads? Check out Short, Powerful and Favorite Books.
• How to Take Great People Photos When You Travel: Need all the help I can get before headin’ to Boston — the first new place I’ve traveled to in too many years. Hope I can capture good memories of Boston. When? Like I’m going to give burglars a heads up. P.S. Burglars, my family will be home. It’s just me doing the traveling.
• Book Bloggers: Oh my gosh… long list! Great for authors looking to find the right audience for book reviews or interviews.
• Five Personal Projects That Will Help You Find Clients: I often recommend to new freelancers to work with nonprofit as a way to start up business.

For fun because we’re allowed…

• World Record for Most T-Shirts Worn at Once: My daughter did this for a video in honor of a friend’s birthday where she put on ALL of her shirts, but it was more like 25 shirts.
• 13 Hilarious Headline Fails: I still wonder how such headlines make it pass the editors. I do placeholders like the “Think of a headline” one — but my editor catches me when I forget to fill it in.
• Google’s broken spell checker credit: Mark Hurst.
• A Pen Mightier Than Any Sword: I love a good pen that writes smooth leaving the right amount of ink behind.

Another teen hits my family. My daughter went first. My brother’s daughter turns 13 today.  She’s the only niece/nephew (Always wondered if there was one word to describe this relative category — also for aunt/uncle, too) I watch grow up because the husband’s brothers’ children are older and don’t live in the area. First cousins close in age living nearby doesn’t happen much in my family. I appreciate having her sweet self nearby to give my kids a cool first cousin they hang with at family events.

Even though my work environment in the summer isn’t the same as during the school year, I enjoy watching the Food Networks, TNTs, USA Networks and Bravos on cable TV. It’s about time someone figured out to offer first run shows in the summer. Even if some of us take vacations, few take vacations that last the entire summer or from watching TV.

Of course, I’m not saying watching lots of TV is a good thing. It’s about moderation and choosing what interests you rather than just watch anything that airs. Anyway, thanks to history lover hubby, I discovered Pawn Stars (I love the banter and learning about the history of the items brought in the shop). I also watch Top Chef (Nice to see a chef from Dallas: Tiffany Derry of Go Fish Ocean Club) and The Next Food Network Star, Psych (love the ’80s references) and decided to record The Closer’s new season rather than waiting for the show to come out on DVDs. (I record everything to watch while doing laundry or working out.)

Brain food…

• A Four Paragraph Approach to Cover Letters: Important information that goes beyond what the book is about.
• No More Mattress: Where to Put Your Retirement Money: Finance information overwhelms many of us. LaToya Irby does a nice job of explaining the different options so you can at least narrow down the list.
• Promote Your Book on Facebook with a Fan Page: Of course, make it about them not you — just like successful social media users do.
• How to Choose a Domain Name That Works: Great advice except I don’t recommend Sedo. I used the service once and very disappointing plus they automatically put you on mailing list and I had trouble getting off.
• Super-Powered Book Proposals Secret #1: There Is No Try. Do! Tell ‘em, Jane!

And for fun because we’re allowed…

• 10 Most Exotic Fruits: Wow, I’ve heard of some of these thanks to Food Network. In fact, the magosteen appeared on Chopped. I tasted my first pomegranate at age eight. I remembered it as sweet, but have yet to taste as good a pomegranate as my first one. Besides, that stuff stains easily if you’re not careful.
• 15 Funniest Accidentally Naughty Headlines: Are they all really accidental or Freudian slips? As a writer, I know how you get wrapped up in content that you don’t realize you have a typo (as in too vs to) or write a sentence that has another meaning.
• 115 Movies About Writers, Writing and/or the Writing Life: Excellent list … sometimes a good movie revolving around writing can inspire and renew. I picked up a couple tips from The Shipping News.
• Motivational Posters from the Movies: Love, love Office Space. Seen the James T. Kirk before — makes me laugh every time.
• Keyboard Quiz: No peeking!! Eyes on the monitor.

Affiliate Big Fish Games celebrating milestone of ONE Billion downloads with its Big Fish Games Collection on SALE from July 24 through 26, 2010. Enter coupon code ONEBILLION into the coupon code box when you check out to apply the discount.

• PC Games
• Mac Games

What’s your favorite TV show and why?

I admit it. Summer break messes with my writing work that I work shorter hours, blog less and write fewer online articles. While I have one kid old enough to fend for herself (driving) and another going to day camp, summer still disrupts my schedule. For one, the day camp doesn’t start until 9am. By that time, I’ve worked at least two hours during the school year.

Between breakfast and the two younger kids talking to each other, it affects the quiet time I love during the school year. Although I’ve adjusted to start my morning with administrative work and social media catching up, how I start my day sets the tone for the rest of the day. Plus, one kid stays home all day and interrupts me at unexpected times.

Here are the rules I’ve set to be as efficient as possible:

1. No TV downstairs. The noise distracts me. Sure, I can turn off my cochlear implant — but that silence differs from room silence. Plus, turning it off prevents me from hearing the door, the dog or hurt children.
2. Make your own lunch. If I am in the kitchen making my lunch and I’m good about eating at the standard lunch hour, I offer to make lunch for the kids. But if they’re hungry before then, they can make their own.
3. Do interrupt when it’s health-related. I want them to know that getting hurt or not feeling well is important and I need to know ASAP — not at the end of the day.
4. Schedule afternoon appointments. I’m most effective in the morning, so I make all non-work appointments in the afternoon — when I have the choice.

The rules work, but I still get a few interruptions daily that aren’t important. But I won’t impose more rules on the kids. So that’s why I limit blogging and social media time in the summer. I use that time to get client work done. (Heh. Just interrupted because son said he can’t remember how to write a couple of cursive letters.)

Whether you have children at home, there may be other times of the year that become more disruptive than the usual. How do you manage during those times of the year?

I debated whether to attend this annual sale after ridding my house of 300+ books. George Angus convinced me. I survived the sale and walked away with just FOUR books! It’s amazing when you find a book that you have on your “to read” list.

My youngest went to see the new Dallas Cowboy Stadium. I have yet to get there myself. He also met former Cowboy receiver Michael Irvin. For non-sports fan, Irvin was a former Dancing with the Stars contestant.

Brain food…

• 9 Expert Tips for Better Writing: Love the quotes that accompany each tip.
• A Good Edit Would’ve Fixed That: April Hamilton, judge for self-published book awards, shares common problems she sees in the submissions — not your basic typos. [Link: BubbleCow]
• Best WordPress plugins for writers: Got some of these loaded already… need to check out AP Style Dates and Times. I tend to follow AP Style. However, I prefer am/pm to a.m./p.m., but I understand AP’s thinking behind this.
• A Novel’s Setting Can Be Your Marketing & Promotion Linchpin: How a self-published author sold almost 50,000 books. Inspiring success story!
• Unmask Parasites: I hope we never need this, but might be worth saving. If you think your site has been hacked, run this. [Link: Alan K'necht]
• 18 Things I’ve Learned About Book Marketing: Very detailed tips that includes a script for calling book stores. [Link: Debbie Ohi]
• Social Media Content Worksheet: Although from Jay Baer, I’m sending you to Georganna Hancock’s Posterous as she has great stuff and she’s worth following. [Link: Lori Widmer]

For fun because we’re allowed…

• Lego Movie Posters: I gave my son a cool LEGO Star Wars: The Visual Dictionary (affiliate). (Even I liked browsing it.) It’s incredible how Lego spun off a whole new world with its movie versions of the toys. I enjoy building them with my sons, but I don’t like that they fall apart easily.
• Funky and Fun Keyboards to Brighten Your Day: Browsing these cool keyboards will put a smile on your face unless you don’t like Star Trek, Garfield, The Simpsons, etc. etc.
• 80+ Creative Geek T-Shirts: I recognized a bunch (I love looking at geeky things) and discovered a few newbies. Always loved the “There’s no place like 127.0.0.0.” Also love the typographic tees.
• 7 Ridiculous Products Licensed by Major League Baseball: Hey, what’s wrong with Mr. Potato Head? [Link: Blair Semenoff]

Y’all know I love my books. They’re cheaper than gadgets (I love them, too) and reveal all kinds of wonderful stuff. My seven-year-old’s book shelves overflowed that I couldn’t straighten it anymore. His shelves were the culmination of Mom’s pre-children collection, big sister’s outgrown collection and big brother’s dumped collection.

He let go of many picture books (Aw, I’m proud since it means he wants to challenge himself with harder reading material) and then I reviewed his 250+ books to see what I wanted to keep. This task scared me as I feared I would hold on to too many. Well, I managed to select no more than 20. Proud of myself. Repeat with older son’s books. Survived again.

Plus it’s summer time. You know what that means? It means I start watching Style, Food Network, Bravo type stuff with shows like Clean House and Hoarders. These also motivated me to dump a lot of stuff. I’m even trying to find a home for my precious Theatre World Annual collectible books. These I won’t just give away.

The local Friends of the Public Library is having its annual book sale this month. Debating whether to go. Do I really need to haul in more books? Of course, it won’t be 100 books — I don’t think I’ve ever bought more than 10 (used much restraint!).

Another openin’, another set of links…

Brain food…

• How to Simplify When You Love Your Stuff: When I came across this the day after the great Snave (read it backwards) book clean of 2010, I knew what to write about in this post.
• “No!” Is a Complete Sentence: Fabulous post from Anne Wayman. Y’all know how it is to say, “No.” But Do you continue on with an explanation or do you stop there? Lori Widmer refers to Anne’s post and adds another important factor — the client’s reaction. Put these two together and you’re golden the next time you need that n-o.
• Winners of Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest: “A whimsical literary competition that challenges entrants to compose the opening sentence to the worst of all possible novels.”
• 5 Reasons to Title Your Art: While focused on artwork, it can apply to many things. When I see “Untitled,” I move on and don’t waste my time with it.  [Link: Marcia Yudkin]
• Ultimate iPhone Apps for Writers: 30+ Productivity and Creativity Boosts: I still use a BlackBerry, but own an iPod Touch. I don’t know that I’d ever want to make the switch to an iPhone because (1) I type faster on hard keyboard than on screen keyboard, and (2) iPhone / iPod Touch has addicting time-wasting apps that having it with me all the time could be harmful to my time management efforts. (I don’t have iPod Touch with me very often.)

And for fun because we’re allowed…

• 12 Unbelievable Mosaics: These artists have unbelievable patience.
• Clients from Hell: Hope you don’t recognize anyone here.
• Over 15 Very Funny Posts and Other Links to Make You Laugh About Freelancing: See comments for a few more.
• Time’s Best Blogs of 2010: Lists a few that I love like Cake Wrecks, The Oatmeal and GeekDad. I discovered a few cool ones I hadn’t met like PostSecret, S___ My Kids Ruined, Information Is Beautiful (How did I miss this one when I have this info visualization collection?), Shorpy (Reminds me of browsing through my grandparents’ photo albums… just something about black and white photos from the early 1900s) and more.
• 28 Minimalist Movie Posters: I used to collect Broadway show posters. Actually, having the posters paid off as I held a Broadway-themed party and put them to use. Anyway, enjoy the neat tour of these minimalist movie posters — some excellent and some eh? Love Shawhank Redemption’s poster.
• Login is not a verb: What do you think?
• Re-imagining four common products from 2010 as if they were designed in 1977: An MP3 player, laptop, mobile phone and handheld video game system. Geeks will love this tour of what a flash from the past would look like had these existed in the ’70s.
• Dream Chronicles: Book of Air (affiliate): Dream Chronicles games consist of breathtaking scenes and lots of challenging puzzles. The cheaper standard edition is out. This could be how I’ll spend some of my weekend especially since it looks like a rainy one.

How do you manage your book collection?

Lori Widmer of Words on the Page tells the story of running into a fellow freelancer and playing catch up. The freelancer reported an empty client pot and that “no one’s calling.” I’d love to know how many businesses thrive by sitting back and expecting everyone to come rushing in to hire the business.

Waiting for Clients

If I waited for people to call, I’d be in her situation, too. Marketing isn’t a passive activity or one that we do when we have more time on our hands. Successful freelancers make marketing part of the job. Picturing cold calls? Cold calls work well for many freelancers while others don’t touch that. Networking without Walls or Boundaries lists a few ways to do marketing and they work for me.

Wondering why I have a picture of my son doing archery? Marketing is like archery. If you don’t do it at all, you have no chance of landing anything. If you shoot 10 arrows without aiming, at least one is bound to hit the target. It may not be the bull’s eye, but it’s something. Don’t just sit there, do marketing.

Finding the Right Marketing Activities

Maybe you feel overwhelmed by the many options we have available to us for networking and marketing. Start with one thing. Ignore the rest. Just pick one. Don’t make yourself crazy. Need some ideas? Here are 40+ Easy Marketing Activities for Freelancers.

After you find two or three activities that work for you, then proceed with the next step on How to Manage Your Time with Social Networks.

I’m busier now than two years ago. I used to do book and game reviews all the time. Now, I hardly do them because I have more writing and other work to do. That’s on top of managing my family of five (and doing all the appointments), exercising daily for at least one hour and getting my seven to eight hours of sleep. In spite of this, marketing remains a consistent part of my job.

In writing for several business newsletters, one message keeps repeating itself. When a business needs to cut back on spending, successful ones never cut the budget or time spent on marketing. Those that do eventually lose momentum that by the time things improve, they’re behind their competitors who kept on marketing.

How do you make marketing part of your work? What activities do you do?

4th of July Bits and Pieces…

4th of July in 2007

Shirts. Grandma (my mother) loved to buy Old Navy Independence Day shirts for the grandkids (my kiddos). I don’t know how many we have, but they came in handy two years ago. My second child had a little thing going with a teacher one year where he’d earn points for wearing an American flag shirt. One time, he wore at least three them to have fun with his teacher. This isn’t the kind of kid who likes school — quite the opposite. It warmed my heart to see him having fun with a teacher like that. I also have a daughter — the oldest of the three — but never got a pic of her in a flag shirt. She was usually away at camp.

4th of July in 2004

Living in DC. Living in Washington, DC had one cool benefit — July 4th. Husband and I didn’t fight the traffic or try to go to the Independence Day celebration on the capitol lawn. Instead, we went to a special spot next to the Anacostia River and caught the fireworks there. No traffic. I lived in DC the year that Patti LuPone did the show — man, I would’ve loved to see her in person. Me + crowd = disaster.

Traditions. On 4th of Julys while growing up, my family went to a good friend’s house with a huge backyard, swimming pool and gazebo. Sadly, my family doesn’t have any Independence Day traditions. Our town has a parade every year, but kids don’t care to go. We went once and that was that. At least, we experienced it.

To celebrate our country’s 234th, we’ll probably grill some food, swim and go to a parking lot that has a good view of the fireworks without the traffic.

Cool Mental Floss factoids:

• “AEGILOPS is the longest English word spelled in alphabetical order. In a sentence: ‘Wow, the letters in Aegilops are in ABC order!’” It’s a genus of plants.
• “In a 2003 Deloitte survey on business speak, ‘leverage’ was voted the most hated word, followed by ‘bandwidth’ & ‘touch base.’ I always try to find other words to use besides “leverage” and those aren’t great options either — “maximize” and “make the most of.” Ick.

LOTS of links this week since many folks are taking a long weekend.

Brain food…

• Ask Not What Your Novel Can Do For You: Fabulous tips for authors on blog tours. [Link: Elizabeth Craig]
• Features and Benefits Are So 2009. Sell To Driving Emotion: I love the hole / drill analogy. This tells me I need to finish reading Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion [Amazon affiliate link]. Keep getting busy with book club books.
• Memoir Tip: Lose the Play-by-Play: Superb advice. It is hard to avoid I did this, then this even if you tell it like a story. [Link: Jane Friedman]
• Summer Reading Picks from various authors: Not your usual or expected reading list from Harvard Business Review. I read Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning [Amazon affiliate link] in college. Maybe it’d have more meaning today as I’m older and not facing a thousand pages of required reading per week. Of course, I have Brenda Ueland’s If You Want to Write [Amazon affiliate link], but haven’t read it yet. And of course, a newly revised edition came out in May after I got my copy.
• 50 Things You Can Control Right Now: We experience days when something throws a wrench in our plans that we think our lives are spiraling out of our control. This is a great list to review whenever you feel this way. [Link: Susan Fletcher] And 50 Things to Love About Life That Are Free.
• 57 Power Words for Writing Brilliant Headlines: Organized by theme, too.

And for fun because we’re allowed…

• 10 of the Weirdest Soccer Goals of All Times: In honor of World Cup even though USA lost.
• Passion and Imagination in African Football: Incredible and moving pictures. [Link: Nieman Story]
• Imperial Tea Time: Just an awe-struck photo of two Darth Vaders during tea time. Or perhaps, you prefer Star Wars Lego Foosball Table?
• 15 Hilarious Dogs in Costume: Oh my gosh… some creative ones there.
• Gorgeous Red Color Inspired Photography: I love red.
• How 7 Summer Barbecue Staples Got Their Names: Hamburgers were not originally made with ham.
• Name All the States That End with “A” in four minutes. Dang it. I missed six <pout>.
• 8 Countries with Fascinating Baby Naming Laws: ‘Cuz I love anything names.
• 10 Hilarious Amazon Reviews: Gotta applaud these folks for creativity.

What country holiday traditions do you have?

I’d love to read more stories like these two. They provide valuable insight in human nature, perception and more.

The Executive and the Branch Manager

The first lesson is in perception. I caught this nugget in a New York Times article [Link: Jack Scharff]. It’s a valuable lesson involving a language barrier that applies to people with hard-of-hearing or deafness. I’ve run into this many times in my life.

The interviewee asked Robert W. Selander, retiring chief executive of Mastercard, “What are the most important leadership lessons you have learned?

Brazil is a big country. I was living in Rio and it’s like living in Miami. I was out visiting a branch in the equivalent of Denver. Not everybody spoke great English and I hadn’t gotten very far in Portuguese. As I was sitting there trying to discern and understand what this branch manager was saying to me, and he was struggling with his English, the coin sort of dropped that this guy really knows what he’s talking about. He’s having a hard time getting it out.

As I thought about the places I’d been on that trip, I realized this was probably the best branch manager I’d seen, but it would have been very easy for me to think he wasn’t, because he couldn’t communicate as well as some of the others who were fluent in English.

I think that was an important lesson. It is too easy to let the person with great presentation or language skills buffalo you into thinking that they are better or more knowledgeable than someone else who might not necessarily have that particular set of skills.

I can’t tell you how many times I open my mouth and see the expression on someone’s face change when hearing something different about my voice. If I should ask someone to repeat, I’ll get a similar reaction to the one Selander described. Is it any wonder I love interacting online and social media? It filters out my accent and voice leaving the “language” barrier behind. This allows me to express myself and thoughts without any interference.

The Friend and a Family

The second lesson is in energy. A friend went to a foreign country and had dinner with a family. The family, of course, spoke in their native language. My friend only knew a touch of their language and struggled to follow the conversation. She shared this story and told me how exhausted she was after the conversation. Little did she know she taught me a lesson that I hadn’t learned in over 30 years.

I thought I wasn’t a high energy person by nature. This has nothing to do with enthusiasm, but everything to do with being able to go, go, go — which I can’t, can’t, can’t. I’ll go, go, go when I need to. However, I try to avoid it.

Listening to my friend’s story helped me realize exactly why I don’t have a lot of energy and why I collapse after just one day at a conference. Even though English is my native language, I have to work harder than the average person with hearing to “translate” everything from lips to words. Not everyone’s lips are easy to read, thus my eyes and brain go in overdrive. (It’s true that lipreaders only catch one-third of what the speaker says. Imagine reading every third word in this post.)

While this second lesson won’t affect many of you — it offers unusual insight into my life as a person who is deaf. Maybe you’ll get a different lesson out of this story.

What lessons have you learned from foreign travels or talking with people whose native language isn’t yours?

Doreen Cronin with my youngest

What’s with the noisy title in this edition? Thank you for asking. I bet that those of you with young kids may have figured it out. We met Doreen Cronin, author of Click, Clack, Moo; Thump, Quack, Moo; Duck for President and Diary of a Worm (Amazon affiliate links) — to name a handful. I think a parents enjoyment of reading a book is a good way to measure the quality of a children’s book. You can bet I laugh lots when we read Cronin’s books especially the ones with the cows and duck.

I asked her what she was working on. She said it was the sequel of a chapter book that comes out in the spring. I looked up the chapter book to see if details were available — not yet. I think it’s a great move on her part because the kids — like my youngest – who know her duck and cows book best now read chapter books and beyond. My older son could have discovered her books when he was in the picture book stage — but we didn’t meet them until later.

Dallas Children’s Theater is performing a musical version of Giggle, Giggle, Quack. We hope to catch that one.

Brain food…

• Six Ways Authors Can Promote Books on Facebook: Authors need to take marketing into their own hands and here’s one way to do it.
• 15 Inspiring Home Offices: Kind of makes me appreciate mine more. These setups rock — I like not being against the wall.
• 101 Blogs That Accept Guest Posts: Love this list because it lists the more popular sites as well as the pagerank — but remember pageranking changes and plenty of lower pagerank sites are worth the guest blog post. I also accept guest posts as long as they meet my guidelines. [Link: @txwriter]
• The Cognitive Itch — From Earworms to Déjà Vu: Dealing with can’t get song out of my head, déjà vu moments and tip-of-tongue problems. [Link: Lydia Dishman]
• Become a Book Review Ninja: 10 Steps to Mastery: I’ve been sitting on an how to article for doing book reviews for months. It need spiffying and more storytelling. Well, this is exactly what I was looking for — don’t know that I would’ve used the ninja theme, but I knew a theme would work.

And for fun because we’re allowed…

• 16 Eye Popping Pixel Sculptures You Have to See: Ah, I remember the days of 8-bit graphics. Who knew it could be taken to another dimension?
• 25 Cool USB Drives: I use a boring basic one. What I need isn’t a cool one but a very short one because the one I have keeps getting hit because of the way it sticks out. Wax seal one brings back memories. Yes, I had one. [Link: Jessica Strawser]
• Beautiful and Funny Illustrations by Tokyo Go Go: Something different, colorful and fun to look at. [Link: @bkkmacdaddy]
• 10 Hilarious Yet Ingenious Solutions to Everyday Problems: I could probably use the t-shirt … but it’d help to make plans to travel to another country first.
• Dream Chronicles: The Book of Air: (Big Fish Games affiliate link) I love this PC game series because of its gorgeous screens, absorbing puzzles and captivating storytelling. Right now, it’s only available as a Collector’s Edition, but this gives you time to try the original, Eternal Maze and the Chosen Child.

Tell us about a time when you met an author in person or a celebrity.

It doesn’t cost you anything to lower some pain and better manage stress. In fact, you already own it. You may know it as noodle or the little gray cells. Meet your mind.

Since reading Healing Back Pain by John Sarno, M.D., I experience much less back pain than I have in the past. Sarno says that much of the pain we experience comes from our stresses turning into physical pain. Instead of the mind accepting and handling the stresses and problems, it shuts itself off and converts the stresses into physical pain.

Of course, we can’t solve all of our problems, or at least, not fast enough to avoid the pain. What we can do is learn to accept them and tell ourselves that we’re aware of the problem.

Studies Show Psychological Connection between Mind and Back Pain

Many studies from universities and published in journal have proven the following points that Sarno makes in his book:

• Many patients with cracks in their discs or thinning discs experience no pain.
• The source of many patients’ back pain has been psychological — in how they deal with stress.

To give you a specific reference from Health Psychology journal, a study led by Robert Kerns, Ph.D. shows that using psychological treatments (alone or part of a multidisciplinary approach) decreased back pain more than any other treatment. Search for back pain and psychological intervention, and you’ll see many results.

Stress affects your health. Our caveman brain deals with some problems in “fight or flight” mode. Instead of hitting or running away, we tend to experience hearts beating faster, blood pressure climbing, adrenalin hopping and body aching.

Put Your Mind to Work

I bring up this subject to share how it has helped my back problems and to share how I’ve been dealing with recent stresses.  A report from a standard checkup arrived in the mail requesting a follow up. At first, my stomach flipped and my mind wandered everywhere refusing to return to work. The report even says that the results turn out to be harmless for the majority of people who need this follow up.

I needed more comforting than that. The follow up doesn’t occur for another week — it was the soonest I could get in. Well, I don’t have time to dwell on this especially since it’ll be a few more days before I get results. So how do I refocus? I told myself that the medical staff wants to be on the safe side and double-check things. I also reminded myself that even though it means the pain of another appointment and more time away from work, I’ll rest easier knowing the results are very accurate.

After doing that, I felt less antsy and moved on with my week.

No Worrying Allowed… Not True

I’ve read Dale Carnegie’s How to Stop Worrying and Start Living. Great advice. I put it to work. Still, I worry and dwell on things. It’s OK to get mad, sad, depressed, frustrated, whatever. The trick is not to let it interfere with your life for too long. Go ahead and do the woe is me routine for a little bit. While this routine may not bring progress, it helps us deal with the situation in a way that comes natural to us.

You may not be able to solve the problem right away (or ever, in some cases) or feel better, but you can move ahead with your business. This is where I do the “I accept the problem and I’m doing the best I can to work through it, so don’t you dare turn it into pain” routine. I get right back to work within a day. (unless it’s weekend, then I leave it until Monday.)

This thinking is how I dealt with tests back in my school days. I didn’t have confidence that I’d do well, but it never stopped me from studying hard and doing my best. I know that experts say that negative thinking leads to negative results and so on. But some of us can learn to let the thinking be while doing our best to achieve the opposite.

Funny — I just came across this tweet: “Don’t take negatively about yourself – you may just start to believe it.” @leadtoday. I agree that it can be true — it’s all how you manage it and what you do about it.

How do you deal with stress and difficult challenges?