Guest Post

Welcome to meryl’s notes blog (this here place you’re lookin’ at) in Plano, Texas. We’re honored to be a stop in Joanne Lewis and Amy Lewis Faircloth‘s WOW! Women On Writing Blog tour. We’re hosting a giveaway of a Kindle version of their book Wicked Good [affiliate]. Read on to see how you can win.

About the authors: It was a chilly day in Maine when Amy received the call from her sister, Joanne, “Wanna write a book together?” Amy said yes and the journey began.

Amy is the older sister who loves her two sons and nephew, dogs, volunteering at the Bangor Humane Society, running, hiking, snowshoeing, surfing the web, her brown poodle Teddy, Lola, writing, reading, cycling, going to bed early, spending time with her friends and family, being outdoors when it’s nice outside and indoors when it’s not,and editing Joanne’s writing. She is a pescatarian and a lawyer in Maine.

Joanne is the younger sister who loves her three nephews, her grey poodle Frisco, writing, hiking, snowshoeing, kayaking, cooking, traveling, Florence, Italy, anything to do with the Italian Renaissance, Michelangelo, spending time with her friends and family and being edited by Amy. She a vegetarian and a lawyer in Florida.

Two sisters, both attorneys; as sisters, Amy and Joanne have learned to play to each others strengths—an important lesson for any co-authors.

Two Attorneys Spill the FAQs by Joanne Lewis

Amy and I get asked all the time (FAQ#1) how did two sisters who live in different states and are both attorneys end up writing a book together? My best answer: It beats the heck out of me! Okay, that’s only partially tongue-in-cheek. I know how it happened.

I’m a novelist and I was looking to write another book. I was in my home in Florida and on the phone with my sister and without thinking asked: do you want to write a book together? She was frost-bitten from a long Maine winter and figured, why not? The hard part was actually writing it.

Get ready for the answer to FAQ #2: it took us three years.

Throughout this amazing journey from deciding to write a book together to publication, we have been asked many questions. I have compiled the top 10 FAQs. You already know 1 and 2. Here are the others.

FAQ #3. How did we actually write the book while living in different states? A lot of emails and telephone conversations. Wicked Good takes place in Maine and Massachusetts so one time when I visited her we took a road-trip to Salem and Gloucester where part of the novel takes place.

FAQs#4 and 5. Who came up with the story idea? and Did you alternate writing chapters? We developed the plot as we went along with a lot of trial and error. The mad scientist who wanted Rory’s DNA to cure cancer was thankfully stricken from the novel. The chase scene through the city forest was also mercifully cut. If we didn’t enjoy writing something we figured no one would enjoy reading it so that was a main indicator of needing to take the plot in a different direction.

As the plot moved forward and we came up with ideas we’d ask each other: do you want to write that? Typically, Amy wrote the mother-son scenes, capturing the emotion, and I filled in the rest. We also edited each other’s work, which leads me to FAQ#6: If you have a disagreement over something involving the book, who wins? My answer: Amy. Amy’s answer: Jo.

FAQ#7. Do you write books without the other? Yes, as to me. No, as to Amy. While I am not working as a lawyer, volunteering and writing the Wicked series, I am writing other novels on my own. When Amy is not working as a lawyer, volunteering and writing the Wicked series, she is playing with her dogs.

FAQ#8. How do you find the time to practice law and write novels? It’s not easy. That’s why Wicked Good took three years to write.

Are you writing another book together is FAQ #9? Yes. It’s called Wicked Wise. Rory is nineteen years old and about to graduate high school. We’re hoping to have it published in 2012. We are also planning on continuing the Wicked series where we follow Rory as he ages.

And the FAQ #10 is (drum roll, please): Did writing Wicked Good bring you both closer together? Absolutely!

Wicked Good is the story of a single mom raising an adopted Asperger’s Syndrome child. The adventure begins when Rory, the boy, decides to set off in search of his birth parents. The story is part mystery, part drama with a good dose humor and a bit of “witchy” history. In the end, mother and son discover more than just the origin of Rory’s birth — they discover the deep bond of love that they have with each other.

Comment and win: For a chance to win a Kindle copy of Wicked Good [affiliate], please leave a comment at least 50 words long about writing about parents or Asperger’s. You could share a favorite memory, an intriguing fact in your family history or even something witchy. You have until 11:59pm on October 4, 2011 to qualify for the drawing. The unbiased and robotic Random.org has the honor of picking the winner.

Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2011 Meryl Evans

Welcome to meryl’s notes blog (this here place you’re lookin’ at) in Plano, Texas. We’re honored to be a stop in Mari McCarthy’s WOW! Women On Writing Blog tour. We’re giving away a copy of her eBook, Who Are You? How to Use Journaling Therapy to Know and Grow Your Life. Read on to see how you can win.

About Mari McCarthy: After twenty years as a business consultant Mari McCarthy switched gears. The catalyst was a health issue for which the remedy became her new life path. Mari now assists others with personal development and health issues through therapeutic journaling.

Mari says that journaling has become her “tool for life.” She keeps a journal in her office for assistance in business, one in the family area for use with introspection, and one by the bed for dream work. Through journaling Mari has discovered many things about herself, like her desire and talent for singing! Watch Mari’s video for “To Make You Feel My Love” on YouTube.

Reality Show: Your Journal As Documentary by Mari McCarthy

It might be said that the current-day version of the daily journal is the reality show. Both of these mediums delight in the power of the everyday to shock and enchant us. In both journaling and reality shows, very mundane things take center stage.

There’s a deliciousness in realizing the ramifications of each minuscule moment, whether it’s your own life or someone else’s. There’s a thrill in understanding how the choices we make in the minutia of an hour create our lives.

Unlike reality shows, which tend to be all over the map, documentaries have definite aim and purpose. When people make documentaries, they are exploring a certain thread. They have a fragment and they go looking for other fragments which, when all strung together, make a mosaic that brings a new depth of meaning / understanding to a particular subject.

When people keep journals, they don’t always recognize the thread they’re exploring. Sometimes it’s just a brain-dump, letting out inhibited emotions, letting off a little steam so you can carry on more calmly in your life. (Isn’t that why you watch reality shows?) This kind of journaling is healing and good. Just because it’s unfocused doesn’t mean it has no value.

When you re-read your “reality show” entries after some time has passed, you will see that it is a collection of fragments that add up to more than the sum of their parts. But in the moment, this is neither clear to you, nor important. Only the moment is important. As in a reality show, there’s a chain of events, but you only remember it later.

On the other hand, you can purposefully use a journal as a documentary, one that traces your commitment to something: learning Spanish; losing weight; being a mother; your religious or spiritual faith; your talent for whittling, or whatever. In this case, the overall theme is given (though not necessarily strictly adhered to) and a chain of events is anticipated.

Using journaling as an aid when you anticipate progress – or at least increased understanding – in any given direction can be enormously helpful. Like taking a shortcut when the way is long and arduous, keeping a journal provides a short-hand route to awareness.

When documenting anything, you follow it, ideally from beginning to end. When you follow any aspect of your life or consciousness, you make at least a mental documentary of it. When you keep a journal during the process, you maintain both a bird’s eye and a close-up view. The result? Prismatic!

You know where you are today and you can at any time re-discover where you where in the past. You gain a sense of swimming as opposed to just drifting with the current.

When you document instead of drift, you can perceive all dimensions of your experience. It’s like putting puzzle pieces together. You are building something.

Some people keep two or more journals going at the same time. There’s the daily session with your Inner Coach, and then there’s the journal documentary of your trip to Eastern Europe or your job on the floor of the NY Stock Exchange or your 2011 vegetable garden.

The Inner Coach – your inner reality show – is a staple that’s with you all the time, while the documentary journals come and go. The two kinds of journals serve different purposes, but they are equally indispensable.

Comment and win: For a chance to win a copy of the eBook Who Are You? How to Use Journaling to Know and Grow Your Life, please leave a comment at least 50 words long about writing about your life. What kinds of documentary journaling do you do? Do you censor yourself? What’s your approach? You have until 11:59pm on September 1, 2011 to qualify for the drawing. The unbiased and robotic Random.org has the honor of picking the winner.

Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2011 Meryl Evans

For most small-business owners, keeping the books isn’t a highlight. They prefer to focus on improving and expanding their core business. Bookkeeping? That’s a chore. Yet, running a successful business requires effective bookkeeping.

Photo from sxc.hu user Morrhigan

As a small-business owner, you might not have the budget to outsource your bookkeeping responsibilities. Instead, you have to learn how to survive without a full-time bookkeeper, balancing your time between nurturing your business’ core values and recording, monitoring and tracking your business’ finances.

Here are five tips for small business bookkeeping.

Understand the purpose of bookkeeping. Before getting started on a good bookkeeping system, it helps to understand how these financial records fit into your business. With a clear picture of how much money your business makes and expenses on a daily, weekly, monthly, yearly basis, you can better evaluate what’s works and what doesn’t.

You may discover one products using more resources than it’s bringing in profits, it may be time to cut that product. If another product or service produces high profits one month and remains consistent the next few months, you can look at what you did differently and expand your opportunities from there.

An effective bookkeeping system can also help you meet budget goals and evidence of a stable, well-managed business if you ever need support from banks or other sources of capital.

Make bookkeeping a part of day-to-day business. Accurately keeping track of your business requires recording your finances on a daily basis. Find a bookkeeping system that works for you, and then set aside time each day to record your cash and credit sales, accounts receivable and accounts payable, and detailed summaries of transactions.

When bookkeeping becomes a routine part of your business, it gets easier with time. Once tax season arrives, you’ll want those records to prepare an accurate income tax return. The more organized and up-to-date your bookkeeping system, the less you’ll have to spend on accounting fees, and the less frustration you’ll have to endure come tax season.

Use the right bookkeeping programs. Accounting software programs makes it easy to automate the bookkeeping process. These do everything from tracking purchases to analyzing purchasing trends. FreshBooks, QuickBooks and Sage Peachtree are accounting programs that offer products catering to various business types. If you’re a small startup, you probably want to choose the most basic package, and upgrade as your business needs grow.

Be aware that accounting software programs still require a great deal of training and education to use properly. Attending a workshop can really help you better understand how to get the most out of the program for your specific business needs.

Once you’re set up and ready to start automating bookkeeping procedures, you can integrate the program with your payment process to further streamline business. If you have a merchant account provider, find out if it can synchronize your merchant account with your accounting software to avoid double data entry and receive reports that are more accurate.

Manage your paperwork. You need to keep those receipts and documents for your records. The key is to stay organized. Maintain a clearly labeled filing system sorted by product lines, expenses, clients, date – whatever works best for you. Protect important, confidential files in a fireproof safe. You can even scan your paperwork to import directly into accounting software, so you can keep all your files in one place and find them quickly.

You may not have to worry about piles of paperwork as much anymore since more businesses have gone paperless. Sign up for automatic withdrawals and deposits with your bank and electronic invoicing with suppliers or utility companies. Provide your customers with paperless options to minimize billing costs and better organize invoicing details.

Also, consolidate your vendors whenever you can. For example, with a credit card processor that offers all the services you need, you’ll receive just one statement for services like payment processing, recurring billing and terminal rentals – rather than three different statements from three different companies.

Don’t mix business with pleasure. Keep your personal accounts separate from your business accounts. Using business funds to pay for personal purchases complicates the bookkeeping process and filing taxes. If you’ve given an employee access to credit cards and account numbers for office spending, monitor those purchases to limit inappropriate purchases and maintain control over your finances.

With the right software, a bit of organization, and daily maintenance of your finances and paperwork, bookkeeping can turn into a simple routine. You can do it on your own, and use the money saved from not hiring a full-time bookkeeper toward something to grow your business. Just remember to record it in the books.

About the Author: Jacqui MacKenzie is a writer for Straight North, a premier Chicago Internet marketing agency that works with BluePay, a leader in small business credit card processing solutions. To start a discussion on effective interactive marketing strategies, visit the Straight North Facebook page.

Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2011 Meryl Evans

After finishing a delicious meal, a customer goes to the cash register to pay for the meal only to encounter a sign, “Cash only. Credit cards not accepted.” Cue frustration, disappointment, anger and panic. “What?! But I already ate the entire meal and am low on cash! Where’s the closest ATM?”

For businesses, “cash only” means lost sales and profits.

Photo from sxc.hu user Rotorhead

With the evolving technology and increasing convenience of credit card processing, many small business owners who once thought a credit card merchant account wasn’t worth the cost may now find that they can’t afford to not accept credit cards. Adapting to your customers’ needs and expectations is crucial to maintaining a competitive edge in today’s challenging market.

A reliable merchant account provider can offer the expertise, products, support and security your business needs to grow.

Features to Look for in a Processing Service

A merchant account provider or credit card processor provides businesses with the ability to accept credit cards and debit cards as payment for services and products.

When comparing merchant account providers, consider the following:

• What are the transaction rates and fees?
• To what percentage of transactions the lowest rates apply?
• What services does the processor provide?
• How reliable is the processor’s customer support program?
• How’s the company credit card security and PCI DSS compliance? (More on this in a moment.)

Costs and Fees

One of the biggest concerns for businesses needing of a processor is cost: What are the transaction rates and fees? Transaction rates are a percentage of the total transaction, while fees can include a flat amount charged by the processor.

Be careful in selecting the processor with the lowest rates and fees. They could also be charging hidden fees. Find out to what percentage of transactions the lowest rates apply. Always know exactly what you are paying for and why.

Services Offered

Another area to look at is the range of services the processor provides. Maybe you need a simple retail merchant account and credit card terminal rental, but what if your business expands? If your merchant processor cannot support your growing needs, you will eventually have to look into a second or third vendor that can provide additional services.

The more affordable and convenient option is finding an all-in-one merchant account provider that provides a wide range of credit card processing services. The provider should also have a secure payment gateway with the technology to efficiently, safely and quickly authorize transactions.

By consolidating your vendors with a one-source credit card processing solution, you’ll have just one statement to deal with and one company to call for questions and support. And speaking of support – you’ll want to look into that, too. Customer support available 24/7 helps reduce lost production and business caused by processing issues. The sooner the problem is resolved, the sooner you can get back to work.

Compliance with the Payment Card Industry Data Security Standard (PCI DSS) is required for all businesses that accept credit card payments. Failure to meet security standards can lead to hefty fines and a loss of business credibility. Be sure your credit card processor offers and implements the proper PCI security features, such as advanced encryption technology and cardholder verification systems.

Get Started!

As with any new project, do your homework and weigh the pros and cons of each merchant account provider and credit card processing service. Talk to colleagues, get several different opinions and stay updated on the latest news and products in the payment processing industry. Then get ready to take that next step toward achieving your business goals.

And throw out that “cash only” sign already.

About the Author: Jacqui MacKenzie is a writer for Straight North, a Chicago Internet marketing agency that works with BluePay, a company offering credit card processing products. To learn more about payment processing industry, follow BluePay on Twitter.

I don’t update my blog as often as I’d like. So I happily accept guest posts when people offer, right? Eh.

Photo from sxc.hu user gwozdek

Almost daily, I receive an email asking if someone can write a guest post for this here blog. 95 percent of the time, I don’t bother responding to these messages just like they don’t bother reading the blog before emailing me.

Signs of an iffy guest post request email

1. Knows nothing about my blog other than the name “meryl.net” or “meryl’s notes blog.” One tries to fake it by saying, “I’ve been reading your blog and just love it.” A closer look at the email proved otherwise. Buttering up can have the opposite effect unless you’re genuine.
2. Mentions their keyword-oriented URL. Obviously, they’re trying to rack up links to improve search engine results. When I check out their websites, I discover a template-oriented site overflowing with keywords and no uniqueness. They also rarely show anyone behind the site. A guest post from these sites reflects poorly on mine.
3. Writes a generic email message.
4. Offers no article suggestions or a spammy one.
5. Fails to know what topic to cover. All you need to do is read the blog and website. Besides, why contact me without knowing this for your sake? You want to choose blogs that fit the audience you want. For example, if your website sells widgets, contact blogs that talk about widgets instead of blogs that talk about thingamajigs.
6. Asks for a topic.
7. Lists links to previous articles. All are spammy, keywordy sites. The article are also generic.

Yes, I’ve made the mistake of publishing a couple of these. I’m sorry for doing that to you. I’ve learned my lesson and have tightened the guest posting guidelines.

Once, a guest published a very similar post the SAME day I published the guest post. I’m still in shock that I found out about it. How? A Twitter tweet! What are the chances of my catching a tweet on the day of the post? This situation further turned me off to guest posts and added another requirement to the guidelines.

A guest post should be no different from entering a person’s home as a guest. Treat it with respect and leave the place better than when you entered it. Oh, it doesn’t mean you should clean it up. A simple sharing of a laugh will do it.

Not all guest posts stink. I’ve had some amazing guest postings here. Most were from folks I knew long before they wrote their guest posts. People like them are always welcome to “Be our guest.” You are, too.

What do you think of guest posts?

Welcome to meryl’s notes blog (this here place you’re lookin’ at) in Plano, Texas. We’re honored to be a stop in Candace Coulombe’s WOW! Women On Writing Blog tour for the Coffee House Fiction Anthology 2010 and The Fifteenth Dame Lisbet Throckmorton Contest. We’re giving away a copy of her book, Second Grace: stories of fresh starts, second chances, and also running away. Read on to see how you can win.

About Candace Leigh Coulombe: Candace Leigh Coulombe is the author of Second Grace: stories of fresh starts, second chances, and also running away and Mercy Seat: a novella of love, loss, redemption, and hagiography. Second Grace won the Compilations/Anthologies category of the 2010 Beach Book Festival and an Honorable Mention in the 2010 San Francisco Book Festival, and an included story entitled “ScentEasy” won the 2009 Environmental Futures Writing Prize.

Candace works in Northern California full-time as a marketing communications specialist and part-time as a writer of short fiction, essays, and poetry. Her work has been recognized by the Sacramento and Elk Grove Public Libraries, NYC Midnight, the American River Review, and PEN Women. Listen to an in-depth interview or read her stories.

The Truth That Allows You to Lie: Using Historical Facts to Enrich Your Fiction by Candace Leigh Coulombe

Gentle readers and writers~

Like many literary women, I feel I was born in the wrong era. It’s through the escape of fiction that I enjoy other times. And, as a writer of flash fiction, I can afford to be capricious. I experience disparate eras, genres, and points of view that would be difficult to commit to, for a reader or writer, in longer forms.

Writing historical fiction isn’t just writing a period piece. You can take a known event or age and craft new characters, or take persons of note and craft new situations. Then, add elements of non-fiction, memoir, or fantasy.

We all need external influences for our work, or we’ll write about the same boy who broke our heart over and over again. My stories have three elements vying for the same little space: practical matters (word count, genre, location, object); inspiration (poem, painting, etc.); and theme. I don’t hold fast to “write what you know,” only to “write what you want to know more about.” So, some of my favorite stories were inspired by news articles. The glimpse of the true story -– the exoticism of a foreign land or time gone by -– makes me want to learn more. Inevitably, in the research, I encounter new ideas that enrich the story. The language should reflect a precise era, location, and social class.

I aim for accuracy, even when the narrative veers toward the fantastical. For example, I was given the task of writing a bus stop horror story. I’d read a news item about German convalescent homes that erected fake bus shelters as a bit of therapy. Around the same time, I’d read accounts of the Lindbergh kidnapping. I pursued a historical fiction-fantasy approach to the perpetrator’s fate in “Buses and Planes.” The characters and details of the Lindbergh affair are true; I’ve just imagined a different fate. There are very small things, some the reader may never know, like the smoke rings one of the characters blows that echo the rings on the real ransom envelope.

For “The Gulf of Aden,” I’d read an article about the precautions some cruise lines were taking when sailing through the eponymous passage, and I wondered what would happen if they didn’t take any. It’s a contemporary story about division of wealth in which the social-climber gets what she thought she wanted and finds it’s not really wonderful at all. But, the story wouldn’t be the same having read up on pirates or Cunard itineraries.

My two best resources are The Complete New Yorker and The New York Times archives. I love having access to a century of news, reviews, and advertising. I wrote “Phoning Arcadia” after reading a “Talk of the Town” column from 1927.

But, for any work, the truth in the details allows you to buy the lie that is the story.

Whether it’s romance, suspense, political satire -– anything, actually — stories aren’t derived from nothing. It’s an interesting obituary, lip print on a shirt or aching piece of music. Then, instead of placing that object in the story, you weave in a thousand details. Lipstick on a collar is almost never from a wife –- a universal story there. But what about laundry marks, collar stays, the faint scent of sizing?

Try to capture a little piece of history in each story. There’s so much beauty in the world. Let your curiosity make your stories replete with truth and beauty and readers will gladly join your adventures.

So, tell me, if you could take any historical event and craft a new ending, what would it be?

Win: For a chance to win a copy of Second Grace: stories of fresh starts, second chances, and also running away., please leave a comment at least 50 words long that answers Candace’s question. You have until 11:59pm on November 1, 2010 to qualify for the drawing. The unbiased and robotic Random.org has the honor of picking the winner.

Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2010 Meryl Evans

Welcome to meryl’s notes blog (this here place you’re lookin’ at) in Plano, Texas. We’re honored to be a stop in Margo Candela’s WOW! Women On Writing Blog tour. We’re giving away a copy of her book, Goodbye To All That. Read on to see how you can win.

Photo credit Alex Ben Parks

About Margo Candela: Margo Candela’s husband owes her six months … preferably on a tropical island sipping margaritas. The deal was, she had three years to write her first novel Underneath It All and find a publisher. She signed the book contract at 2 1/2 years so she still has that six months coming to her. Of course, Underneath It All wasn’t her first novel. Her first was a romance novel spoof she wrote at age 15 on an antique typewriter she paid $20 for — actually her mom paid $20. Sadly, Wenchhead and the Isle of Evil Men was never published. Do you think it was the title?

Published Author Seeks Agent by Margo Candela

It’s inevitable. You get a group of writers together, either just starting out or who have a book or two on the shelves of Barnes & Noble, and eventually the conversation will turn to agents. Writers love to talk about agents, sometimes obsessively. How to get one to notice you? Who’s the best? Why they’re so mean and who’s a flake and shouldn’t be trusted. Besides writing, many writers also like to gossip and I’ll fess up to having done my share.

As of last count I’ve worked with three agents and one literary manager. Even I have to admit that’s a lot, but two became editors and two I fired. (Which is a whole other story.) What I’ve learned since signing my first agency contract in 2005 is that agents are regular people. They have personal problems and short attention spans. They move from agency to agency and sometimes leave the business altogether. As soon as I accepted that agents are human, it made doing business (or not) with them a lot easier for me.

After pretending for a long while that I didn’t need or want an agent, I’m once again up to my neck in the agent pool. This time, though, I’m not sending out blind queries and hoping for the best. I’ve asked a couple people who I trust if they have any names for me and they’ve sent feelers out on my behalf. Having been through the agent search process before, I can attest that this is the best way to go about it. Of course, it helps that I have a track record — I have published four novels, meet my deadlines and don’t have a bad reputation in publishing. I’m lucky to finally know people who genuinely want the best for me.

Even with some valuable introductions, I still have to make a good impression because I’m also being vetted. I’ve learned to be honest about what level of attention I expect from an agent and I’m always very careful to never smack talk anyone I’ve worked with even though it might make for some juicy gossip to bond over.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s still very awkward to have to admit that even though I’m published, I don’t have an agent. People do look at me like I’m some sort of weirdo or maybe an under-medicated diva. All I can do is let my work speak for itself and hope that my next agent is my last.

Win: For a chance to win a copy of Goodbye To All That, please leave a comment at least 50 words long about connecting with an agent, publisher, client or colleague through word of mouth. You have until 11:59pm on September 23, 2010 to qualify for the drawing. The unbiased and robotic Random.org has the honor of picking the winner.

Yee haw! (I can say that because I was born and bred in Texas!) Welcome to meryl’s notes blog (this here place you’re lookin’ at) in Plano, Texas. We’re honored to be a stop in Mary Lynn Archibald‘s WOW! Women On Writing Blog tour. We’re giving away a copy of her book, Accidental Cowgirl: Six Cows, No Horse, No Clue. Read on to see how you can win.

About Mary Lynn Archibald: Mary Lynn Archibald is a freelance editor and copywriter, and the author of two books: Briarhopper: A History, a memoir of one woman’s life from 1913-1945, and Accidental Cowgirl: Six Cows, No Horse and No Clue, a lighthearted personal memoir of a greenhorn’s life on a small cattle ranch. Her forthcoming memoir, due out in early 2011, deals in part with her life as a San Francisco chorus girl.

Finding Humor in Life by Mary Lynn Archibald

Well, it all depends on how you look at it, of course. I find humor in strange places, but then, I had a great teacher.

My father could make most anything seem funny, and the devices he used were: exaggeration, silly words, surprises, and statements that were so utterly ridiculous, you had to at least smile.

Sure, life is very often not funny. Still, mine has often been filled with slapstick comedy. Why? Well one reason that’s obvious to those who know me is that I’m terribly clumsy. That’s not necessarily funny, but after I pick myself up off the floor, there’s not much else to do but laugh.

I often sprinkle my writing with these silly anecdotes.

Consider the time I drove through my garage door. It was a Friday afternoon, and I’d just gotten home from the end-of-the-year party teachers faithfully attended every June, where I’d had a drink or so to celebrate my impending summer’s freedom. I was feeling fine, I thought, and had lots of time for the alcohol to wear off before I needed to make a two-hour drive south in order to attend my brother’s high school graduation.

I just needed to round up my two kids, take a brief nap, change clothes and hit the road in plenty of time to get there for the evening ceremony.

I should probably mention here that there is a 15-year gap between my brother and me, but my parents swore he was not an afterthought, and I wasn’t going to argue that fact with them. Anyway, there I was at 33, headed off to see him just making it out of high school.

Problem was that I had left the sprinkler going on the front lawn, parked my car with the driver’s side window down, and discovered this fact too late. The driver’s seat was somewhat soggy, so I decided I’d back the car out of the driveway and into the sun where the seat would dry faster, as a bath towel was only a temporary solution.

That was not really a problem, I thought, as I could just sit on the passenger side of the car and work the brake and steering from there.

But then the fatal flaw in my thinking asserted itself, as I quickly found I was unable to work the gas, or the brakes, or steer, from the right side of the car.

I did manage to let off the brake, put the car in gear, and step on the gas. What I hadn’t realized however, was that instead of putting the car in reverse, I had put it in drive, and by the time I knew what had happened I was sitting in my garage, noticing that the front end of my car had severely dented my electric dryer, which was the only thing that had stopped the car from ending up in the kitchen.

That was funny enough, but when I got out, I noticed that the garage door was now sitting on top of the car.

I thought that was hilarious, and when the neighbors arrived, alerted by the sound of the crash, I was standing there, surveying the scene of carnage and laughing my head off.

There didn’t seem to be anything else to do. But you’ll be happy to know I was subsequently quite sobered by the event, especially when I remembered I had a $1000 deductible insurance policy on the car.

Win: For a chance to win a copy of Accidental Cowgirl: Six Cows, No Horse, No Clue, please leave a comment at least 50 words long about a clumsy or humorous moment — sure, it can be both clumsy and humorous. You have until 11:59pm on August 16, 2010 to qualify for the drawing. The unbiased and robotic Random.org has the honor of picking the winner.

Like Mary Lynn, I’ve driven into the garage door… TWICE. The first time, I had all my kids with me and pulled into the garage too fast that it scraped the top of my big honkin’ Expedition. (Car: 1. Garage door: 0.) The second time: I pass the garage door opening when I walk to my car and usually open it before I get in. That said, I’m used to the door being open and ready when I start the car. Well, I opened the garage door and backed up. (Car: 2. Garage door: 0.) After two repair bills, I hope I don’t do this a third time. I pick damaging the garage door over the car — thank goodness for that!

Share your clumsy or humorous moment. Of course, it can qualify as both.

Writers tend to be  an insular lot. Let’s face it, we work on our own, stuck in our own headspace, most of the time. We sit in front of our computer, or if we’re particularly old school, typewriter, and venture nary a toe into the outside world. (Sometimes all day, sometimes all week!) As a result, we also tend to rank pretty high on the pasty scale (oh, sunshine, how we miss your warm embrace and supply of vitamin D).

Most of us choose to work from home because we think it will give us freedom to lunch with friends, go grocery shopping early, hit daytime classes at the gym and so on. But how many of us do these things? If you’re like me,that would be zero. I find that writing from home has only allowed me the freedom to shower (much) later than I used to. I now sit in front of my computer all day long, waiting for the next job to come in. I even got a laptop so I could work outdoors, but I never do. So what’s the problem?

Thou Shalt Be Creative… NOW

As writers, we are, by necessity, creative. In fact, we often need to be creative on command. This grows tough over time. After all, we don’t often inspire ourselves. The things that make us creative usually come from an outside source and if you’re stuck playing the me-and-my-computer game, you are going to hit the limits of your ingenuity. You may counter, as I have, that you can get all the outside help you need on the internet, but it’s not true. Writers need to get out of the house, not only to improve the quality of their work, but to improve the quality of their lives.

For one, you can only focus on a task for so long before you need to reboot your brain with a break. The brain suffers from energy drain just like a battery. Sitting in front of a computer for hours leads to work that is boring, repetitive and sloppy. I know, I’ve done it. And it’s usually followed by a request for a rewrite.  A simple grabbing coffee (or insert beverage of choice) with a friend or reading the paper in the park rejuvenates your mental facilities and ready to work again.

Humanity Demands Social Interactions

Besides that, we are social creatures. Even the most introspective people crave human contact and interaction, so don’t let yourself fall into a funk and neglect your social yearnings. Join a class or make ongoing dates to meet with friends, and do not cancel! Look at the time away as your reward for hard work and make every effort to enjoy it to the fullest. Freedom is the best reason to work from home, so take advantage of it. Do you know how many people would love to set their own schedule instead of feeling caged like a cubicle-monkey?

As a freelance writer, you have the flexibility to develop an active social life, so don’t let yourself become isolated. It not only affects your work, but also it has a negative impact on your mental and physical health (not to mention your relationships). Creativity demands a variety of sensory input, so leave the old ball and chain (and keyboard) at home and take a zumba class at the gym, meet your friends for lunch or go see that awful movie that you can’t get anyone to go see (et tu, MacGruber?).

Your work (and your well-being) depends on it!

About the guest author: Alexis Montgomery is a content writer for Online Colleges who gives advice on the pursuit of higher education and living a healthy life. In her free time she enjoys reading, writing, and spending time with her family and friends.

Welcome to meryl’s notes blog (this here place you’re lookin’ at) in Plano, Texas. We’re honored to be a stop in Lisa de Nikolits‘ WOW! Women On Writing Blog tour.

Lisa’s book, The Hungry Mirror, tells the fictional story of a woman who starves until she finds herself trapped into a seeming-sanctuary cage of addictions walled by self-hatred and filled with doubt. She discovers the value of size zero is also zero. This novel doesn’t do the typical adolescent anorexia thing. Instead, the character is an adult who continues to function as a designer and wife despite being anorexic, bulimic and obsessed with her body image.

About Lisa de Nikolits: Originally from South Africa, Lisa has been a Canadian citizen since 2003. She also lived and worked in the U.S.A., Sydney, Australia, and London, England. She graduated with a Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and Philosophy and contributed to various international anthologies. She has been an art director on Vogue, Vogue Living, marie claire and Cosmopolitan. Visit www.lisadenikolitswriter.com for information about the book and www.lisadenikolitsdesign.com for more information about her career as an art director. You can order the book at Amazon Canada and Inanna.

This Book Versus That Book by Lisa de Nikolits

“I’m writing a book on how to bounce back from bankruptcy,” my editor friend told me. “I’ve done the first chapter.”

“I’m doing a cookbook, you wouldn’t like it, I use a lot of oil,” my art director friend said. “I’ve finished two chapters.”

“I’m writing a book on being a life coach,” my women’s group facilitator said. “I haven’t started yet, I’m taking the summer off to focus on it.”

“Write a screenplay that I can make into a movie,” an editor friend advised.

“I’m writing young adult novels, and I came this close…” a freelance copyreader said.

“The money’s in murder, mystery and crime. Write a bestseller,” my brother-in-law insisted at the dinner table.

“Tell everybody about your book,” the account executive said to the creative director at a meeting about a photo shoot.

The creative director flushed red, said she had only thumb-nailed the intro really, and changed the subject.

Everybody’s writing a book, it seems.

It took me fifteen years to develop my book from quickly scribbled short story to a 344-page finished product. And mine proved to be a novel on women, eating disorders, body image and the like.

“Self-help always sells,” my family said approvingly.

Uh, no, it not self-help. Not by any means. It’s an up-close and personal look at the world of adult women who suffer from a range of eating disorders.

Not an easy book to write. Not an easy book to read.

“An unconventional treatment of eating disorders, which are often presented in fiction as merely an adolescent phase. De Nikolits shows how such disorders can in fact continue into adulthood. The sufferer appears fully functioning, while in reality their body obsession permeates every facet of their lives… an uncomfortable read…” says a review in the May issue of Canada’s Quill & Quire. But, it adds, “a thoughtful and strong conclusion.”

Doug O’Neill, Canadian Living Magazine commented, “In The Hungry Mirror, Lisa de Nikolits cuts straight to the bone and slices open the gut-wrenching hurts of a circle of self-conscious (and mostly self-critical) characters who are obsessed with weight and body image. De Nikolits takes us to the dark side of a Bridget Jones world where cliques of media-savvy women gather round the water cooler – but where real pain is exposed in broad daylight. The pages of The Hungry Mirror are a gluttony of references to bulimia, calorie counts, and bingeing, but de Nikolits’ real message is about cravings – cravings for self-acceptance, cravings for love.”

Many were the times I hoped the book wouldn’t ever be published. Did I have the courage to be the banner-bearer of this message?

Oh, far easier to write a murder-mystery, coming of age, self-help, cookbook that could be made into a screenplay and movie.

But something about this book wanted to live. This book, The Hungry Mirror, climbed and clawed its way to life, its message insisting on making it to the finish line of being printed.

And there it is, my voice, my message. This is the book I wrote. Not that one, but this.

How do you deal with comments from family and friends about a dream or project? Or share your thoughts about book authoring.