We have an interesting dialogue happening that started with Diana’s Describe Your Ideal Job entry, which addresses how to answer such a question in a job interview. Stu Kopelman responded with logical points believe there is an “ideal job.” How many times have you been asked, “What is your dream job?”

Even if you document a dream job on paper, will you be happy every day in that job? Unlikely. Heck, you could work in your dream job for two different companies and end up being happy in one and miserable in the other. It’s not just the responsibilities and the day to day activities that identify a job as enjoyable or miserable. It’s also the environment, mentality, morale, and management styles.

When all the factors are positive (job role, management, environment, and so on), there will be days when you’re frustrated or angry. The happiest marriages and parents who love their kids all face bad days. Everything in life has a “bad” to it. But does that mean it’s not your dream spouse, dream family, or dream job? Not at all. It’s like your body — it’s going to have its bad days no matter how good you take care of it.

Now that I am full-time with meryl.net, I’m loving the job and experience. I’ve had a few down times, but they don’t last long and I handle them well because I love the overall work I’m doing. I just read a commentary from Robert Ringer in Early to Rise, it’s not about the negative situation, but how you handle it. Here’s an example Ringer used:

“…tabloid headlines were screaming that New York Mets catcher Mike Piazza was gay. Piazza did only one interview, and said to the interviewer in a calm, straightforward manner, ‘I’m not gay.’ No anger, no hysteria, no scowl. As a result, the story died in a matter of days.”

It’s like “fighting fire with fire” or “adding fuel to the fire.” If Piazza had come back in defensive mode with all sorts of rantings and ravings, you can bet the tabloids would’ve run with it for a little longer. If Clinton had simply apologize for his “relations with that woman” instead of denied it, perhaps it would’ve quickly died away.

I’ve gone to talking about the ideal job to handling negative situations. We encounter criticism no matter how good we are. I remember the first time I was slaughtered in my blog, I was in shock. Not mad, but in shock that someone thought this of me. But then I stepped back and reminded myself that we all have one critic in our life no matter who we are. Accepting it rather than fighting it is a lot easier on the soul.

Some book reviewers say that when they don’t like a book, they simply don’t review it. I’d love to take the easy way out, but when I think about it from a reader’s perspective… I want to know when a book sucks. I recently had to give low ratings to a book. I posted it on Amazon and no where else. More people find the book on Amazon than on my site or other places where I post reviews.

For one book, I contacted the author and explained why I couldn’t give it good reviews. I didn’t write about it since I believed my association with an organization would bias my review more than usual. The author understood my views and let me know he plans to modify future editions based on some of the things I mentioned, but not the key areas. So it’s unlikely I’ll review the second edition.

From the minute you decide to be a writer, you can count on negative feedback, or at least, areas needing improvement. A couple of people might tell you I take feedback personally, but that’s not the case. Some folks don’t know how to provide feedback and make it sound personal rather than an honest criticism for improving the content.

When I edit, I try to keep in mind what it’s like to be the author receiving the feedback and word it in a way that helps rather than hurt. Some people nitpick because they refuse to allow any content go through the process error-free. Nitpickers also do this because it affirms they know everything.

Working with someone for the first time makes the process harder. That person doesn’t know how well (or not) you take feedback. Some tiptoe around it, provide straightforward comments, or slam it.

Writing easily challenges a person’s confidence. One minute, articles get raves and the next, no one accepts it. My self-confidence has been all over the place, but I think we all go through it no matter our career of choice.