One Halloween while helping my mom pass out candy, I saw a kid in a cute Bugs Bunny costume. The costume was made out of nice material instead of the weird smelling plastic mask and the stiff vinyl bodysuit. See Exhibit A for an lovely example of a vinyl Darth Vader costume. What’s up with my reaction in the photo? I wasn’t happy someone took my picture before I could get my mask on.
I can’t recall exactly how the cute Bugs Bunny costume looked except that it wasn’t the vinyl most of us wore those days unless we were lucky enough to have a parent who could sew or pull pieces together into a clever costume. It was probably some variation of these bunnies.
That costume stuck with me. When it came time to pick a costume for the following Halloween, I told my mom I wanted to be Bugs Bunny. I smiled as I pictured myself wearing that awesome costume instead of the plastic vinyl mashup.
What did I get?
This:
Think I was a happy wabbit?
Mom and I both understood what “Bugs Bunny” meant. The problem stemmed from her not knowing about the costume I saw the year before. And I didn’t provide more details because I assumed she’d find the right one. The costume I wanted was probably not available in any store. There I go again with an assumption that it was a homemade costume. The only way to find out was to ask the girl about her costume.
Assumptions lead to disappointment. How do we know what to communicate to a coworker, client or colleague? We’re stuck in our heads that we forget the other person doesn’t know XYZ. Learn to over-communicate and remember the other person may not have all the facts you do. Another helpful tool is to share examples. For a web design project, for example, clients can make a list of websites they like and explain why they like each one. Maybe it’s the color scheme in one design, the layout in another, the writing in another.
Sometimes it takes practice and experience. One client has a unique way of communicating his wants. He’s not a poor communicator, but a different type of thinker than I am. Not good or bad. Just is. That’s where understanding personality types helps. When he hired an intern, she confided that she had trouble understanding what he wanted. I admit feeling relieved knowing it wasn’t me and helped her learn from my experience.
Overcoming assumptions sounds simple. However, some folks think you’re not a self-starter if you keep asking questions and talking about it instead of running with it. Some fear asking too many questions reflects poorly on their abilities. Which would you rather have? Someone who erases assumptions with conversation and gets it right the first time, or someone who gets right to work and produces plastic vinyl results?
“If you don’t have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?” – John Wooden.
How can you communicate better to avoid assumptions?
Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2012 Meryl Evans
The AP is Changing the Way Their Reporters Use Twitter reports that the Associated Press (AP) is forbidding writers from sharing opinions in Twitter, including opinions of others through retweets. I understand AP wants to ensure its reputation for unbiased reporting remains intact.
My initial reaction was tripping over my jaw that had somehow landed on the floor. But the more I thought about it, the more I understood the concern. Let’s say you read an unbiased AP article about hydraulic fracturing. If the AP writer who wrote the story has a Twitter account and tweeted that the problems surrounding hydraulic fracturing are overblown, how would that affect the article? Future articles?
What if the writer makes no mention of writing for AP in his Twitter bio? When I tweet a link to a story, I often look up the writer for a Twitter ID to credit the person with writing the story. If I do that with the hydraulic fracturing writer and see opinionated tweets on the subject — could that reflect on AP and the writer?
As I think about this, I’m at a loss on the right way to handle this. With so much low quality, biased reporting today — maybe it’s necessary for AP to do it for the sake of integrity.
What do you think of AP’s actions? Are they exempt or should it apply to other publications? What about companies? Can employees be allowed to share opinions about competitors and their industry?
And now for your weekly links.
Brain food …
For fun …
Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2011 Meryl Evans
After arriving at my mom’s house on Thanksgiving, my seventeen-year-old daughter hands me an envelope. Perplexed, I opened it to find a incredible and moving handwritten note of thanks from her. Let’s just say it was enough to bring tears. She wrote one for my mom, my siblings, close friends and — the most amazing of all — her two little brothers.
She said she is about to graduate and leave home. She felt she needed to do it.
I write notes to my clients every year … by hand. Yes, it cramps, but it’s worth it. (I even keep a journal, but I guess that’s not enough to keep the handwriting muscles warm.) You can get more ideas from 33 Ways to Reward Your Customers. These have a lot of retailer-related suggestions. However, every business can pick up something from this list.
It isn’t necessary to wait until the holidays to thank your clients. I do that, but I try to send the notes and gifts earlier. (Sent last week.) I’ve sent them pecan pralines (Texas food), books and Boy Scout Popcorn (delicious treat that also helps the organization).
You could also buy stamped postcards and write a thank you anytime you find the opportunity. They’re small and light, so you can carry them with you ready to write on.
How do you thank people?
Weekly Links
Brain food …
Fun …
Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2011 Meryl Evans
When I bought a Flip camera in 2008, I also grabbed video editing software. Before buying the software, I researched for a good editor that wasn’t fancy or power-packed. Just enough to get the job done without spending much time with the user manual. With new software, I can usually dig right in. However, past experience with editing software involved more reading time than editing time. After talking to a few folks and reading reviews, I went with Sony Vegas Movie Studio Platinum Version 8.
I installed Vegas and never used it. Eventually, I uninstalled it because it took up unneeded resources and space. I decided to do a little winter cleaning by identifying the largest files on the computer. Three HD videos made the list, so that prompted me reinstall the editing software.
It can’t open the .m2ts files. This 2008 software has “HD” on the box, but it couldn’t open these files. I went to the website to see if the company had a patch or upgrade so it could open these files. It turned out they no longer support that version of the software. How hard would it be to create a plug-in to import these HD files? A search of user forums yielded nothing. I guess not too many people are using version 8 or they have cameras that don’t produce .m2st files.
Having learned my lesson that I don’t make time for editing videos, I looked around for freeware and cheap converter to convert these HD files into one Vegas 8 could handle. Unfortunately, no freeware app can handle these big files. Actually, there was one and it failed. Besides, I wasn’t comfortable using it because there had been concerns about the app having malware. (While working on this, I came across 10 Free Apps for Working with Video, but none could solve this problem.)
The trial version of Sony Vegas 11 converted the three big videos into one. Windows Media Player (Scroll way down to MPEG-4 section for why) couldn’t play it. Two other players could. Whew. I’m out of the video editing business. Back to using the old digital camera for videos.
I understand software companies have to draw the line in how long they support older versions of software. Is it fair to stop supporting a three-year-old app? Maybe Sony would’ve had a fan in me if they had a solution other than upgrade to 11.
What’s your take on software and support?
And now for your weekly links …
Brain food …
For fun …
Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2011 Meryl Evans
Welcome to meryl’s notes blog (this here place you’re lookin’ at) in Plano, Texas. We’re honored to be a stop in Melissa Ann Goodwin‘s WOW! Women On Writing Blog tour. We’re hosting a giveaway of her book The Christmas Village [affiliate]. Read on to see how you can win.
About the author: Melissa Ann Goodwin is a native New Englander, now living in Santa Fe, New Mexico with her husband, artist J. Richard Secor. She has written extensively for Fun for Kidz, Boys’ Quest and Hopscotch for Girls. She was a regular feature article contributor to the Caregiver’s Home Companion for more than five years. Her poetry took 10th prize in The Writer’s Digest 2010 annual competition. WOW! Women On Writing Blog tour. We’re hosting a giveaway of her book The Christmas Village is her first novel.
I doubt there is a writer alive whose brain doesn’t feel as thick and frozen as a Dairy Queen Blizzard before sitting down to write. It’s why we post on Facebook, sort the laundry and make out the shopping list, when our firm intention that day was to get writing First Thing. We do this, often, because we’re scared. A thousand undermining thoughts creep into our minds: What if I try to write and nothing comes? What if what I write is awful? What if, GASP, it’s not perfect?
But how do we silence that insane Drama Queen screaming inside our heads, terrifying us into paralysis of the pen? Believe me; I count myself among the biggest fraidy-cats of all time. In fact, I let fear keep me from writing for almost 40 years. But I found some practices that have helped me overcome those fears. If you feel a bit paralyzed before sitting down to write, maybe these ideas will help you too.
Make Like the Buddha and Calm Down: Besides being a writer, I’m also a yoga teacher. Part of our goal in yoga is to focus and calm the mind. Similarly, clearing the mind of distractions before writing can help quiet your fears and make it easier to get started. Try this: Sit comfortably and just breathe. Try to empty your mind, but don’t be aggressive about it. Let your thoughts come and go. If you are thinking about your shopping list or other “life” things, just mentally whisper the word, “later,” and try to move on. When you feel calm, open your eyes and start writing.
Leave Your Mind Out of It: The idea of writing without thinking might sound strange at first, but in my experience, it definitely works! After calming yourself with quiet breathing, open your eyes and start writing whatever comes to mind, without even thinking about it. Keep writing fast, without stopping or thinking, for as long as you can. If you slow down and get stuck, write, “I don’t know what to write this is really stupid I can’t believe she told us to do this and I can’t believe I’m doing it.” Good! Keep going. The next thing you know you’ll be writing something coherent and unexpected and surprising. You’ll be amazed by what comes out of you that you had no idea was hiding inside there.
Perfect Makes Crazy: I used to think that what I wrote had to come out of me fully formed and close to perfect. What a silly goose I was! No wonder my panic-stricken fingers hovered over the keys like a Zamboni with transmission trouble. How did I learn to let go of this perfection complex? By giving myself permission to write what the brilliant writer Anne Lamott calls a “shitty first draft.” Just let stuff flow out of you without judgment or mental editing. Let it be really and truly awful. Celebrate its awfulness! After all, that’s why they invented revision.

I think that overcoming our writing fears is less about particular techniques than it is about learning to trust that the well of inspiration is deep and limitless. I’ve discovered that no matter how awful my first draft is, there is always something in it that is worth keeping – a word, a phrase, a snippet of dialogue. Something. We’re all different, and different things will work for each of us. The trick is to experiment, and while you’re experimenting, you’ll be writing. And the more you are writing, the more you will learn to trust in that infinite well.
About The Christmas Village: Jamie Reynolds wished that he could live in Grandma’s miniature Christmas village, and now that wish has magically come true. But is the village really what it seems? What stunning secrets does it hold? And how will Jamie ever get back home? Join the fun, come along on the adventure, and find out!
Comment and win: For a chance to win a copy of The Christmas Village, leave a comment about dealing with any writing struggles. How do you deal with perfection? Facing a blank page? Or share what you think happens in The Christmas Village based on the above description. You have until 11:59pm on November 15, 2011 to qualify for the drawing. The unbiased and robotic Random.org has the honor of picking the winner.
Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2011 Meryl Evans
My quest for a nice costume without the cheap material and plastic proved challenging as gal who loves Halloween. This isn’t a one-time costume, but one to use whenever I needed it. I visited the Disney website and found the Big Bad Wolf costume on sale. PERFECT for my 6’4″ husband. Not the best photo, but you get the idea.
Then I found Daisy on sale. (Unfortunately, no picture of me as Daisy Duck.) It clicked. My dad was popular with the kids because he could talk like Donald Duck. It didn’t take long before my mom and siblings showered him with Donald Duck toys, art and knickknacks that his home office looked like a Donald Duck shrine with a few Betty Boops thrown in. (Mom’s thing that we all started bopping her with Boop gifts.)
One thing about collections — it made it easier to shop for people who had everything they needed. My thing was Broadway and dreidels (spinning tops). Broadway didn’t happen by accident, but dreidels did. I had a couple of them and somehow Paul (aka Big Bad Wolf) decided to add a new one — sometimes two — to my collection every year.
Then Dad died in 2007. This left — among other things, of course — Mom stuck with a massive Donald Duck collection. She kept the more meaningful ones like the Donald Duck latch hook I did. She also gave one Donald Duck item to each of us kids that we had given him. I have the 65th anniversary clock.
Between Dad’s death and tightening belts, I decided to stop collecting dreidels because we didn’t need so much stuff. (I had stopped collecting Broadway stuff ages ago.) Stuff piles up creating more upkeep work. Besides, they just sit on a shelf only to be admired whenever company comes over.
Except for gadgets, I cut buying needless things and spent more time on every buying decision. I still make mistakes and experience buyer’s remorse (Viewsonic gTablet).
I cleared a lot of clutter giving up books I didn’t need and items I hadn’t touched in over a year. Yes, I thought “But what if I need it later? I don’t want to spend money on another one.” Well, later has yet to come and it feels great to be rid of the item.
Do you have stuff you’d like to clear out? What makes it hard to get rid of them?
And now for this week’s links.
Brain food …
For fun because we’re allowed …
Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2011 Meryl Evans
In the mid-nineties, I worked with a colleague who was a published romance author. She did most of her writing in the evenings, her most productive time. My night owl friend arrived in the office as late as possible while I came in early. Despite my being the morning person and her night gal, we worked well together and stayed in touch after leaving the company.
Transitioning from Sleepyhead to Early Bird
I discovered my penchant for early hours at the start of my career. Of course, there was a time when I couldn’t imagine waking up at or before 7:00 a.m. That happened way back when I was a typical teen. In high school, class started at 8:00 a.m., and I slept walked around the house in the morning and somehow made it to school on time. By the time I went to college, my body hated the 8:00 a.m. class. Somewhere between that class and the first job, the body clock changed its ways. And I heard it.
It makes sense to exercise as early as possible for a burst of energy to carry you through the day. I don’t workout until the afternoon sometime between lunch and 3:00 p.m. because I save my mornings for work when I’m most effective. Besides, if I workout in the morning, I feel guilty thinking I should be working. By the time I step onto a cardio machine or pick up dumbbells, I do it with a clear conscious.
On weekends, I exercise before lunch so I can enjoy the rest of the day without a drop of guilt.
Find Your Peak Time
Morning, afternoon, night. It doesn’t matter. Identify your high and low energy times based on the needs of your mind and body. Most of us can figure out when we’re most and least productive. However, if you’re not sure, track your work for one week. Pay attention to when you finish the most work and when you drag that it takes you longer.
Also be aware of the types of tasks you do. For example, you may discover it’s easier to make phone calls in the morning because you’re more alert and social than in the afternoon. For me, I do the bulk of writing in the morning saving admin tasks and editing work for sluggish times.
Knowing my peak time is in the mornings, I avoid scheduling appointments and meetings during that time. I also try to schedule them toward the end of the week when I feel more relaxed having accomplished a lot of work for the week.
When are you most productive? Least productive? Are you a morning or night person? Have you always been that way?
Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2011 Meryl Evans
Ever watch Hoarders, the TV show? What about Clean House? One feeling keeps popping up from the people who live in these messy homes overflowing with stuff: overwhelmed. In a Clean House episode, the homeowner must’ve said “Overwhelmed” at least 10 times when asked how the home spiraled out of control and why didn’t she do something about it.
I understand the feeling. Not from a messiness perspective, but from a mental one. However, I’ve seen my sons’ closets turn into a mini-hoarder zone when they play their little games and mess up each other’s closets. I’d look at the mess feeling overwhelmed. If I were to clean them up (their mess, their job to clean it up), I wouldn’t know where to start because looking at it paralyzed me despite knowing you start by picking up the first item and putting where it needs to go.
The overwhelmed feeling can turn into anxiety and turn into a barrier for getting things done.
Think Day-tight Compartments
I’ve been a worrier since high school, if not before. When I heard about Dale Carnegie’s How to Stop Worrying and Start Living [affiliate], I read the book right around the time I started my first post-college job. Many of its concepts stuck with me for years especially the live in “day-tight compartments” advice. I’ve been applying it a lot lately.
Right before school started, I worried about whether one kid could handle an increased load and how we would manage a busier schedule on top of helping our oldest apply for college and planning a family milestone event.
STOP! Put the blinders on. Think day-tight compartments. OK, I didn’t do this as quickly as I should have. Eventually, I got there after school started and experienced the things that concerned me.
Focus on the Now
Yes, it’s hectic as expected. But instead of making myself crazy, I focus on the now. What do I need to do now? Relish what I am doing now.
Sometimes my mind wanders while watching TV during a workout that I lose track of the story. Stop, rewind, shut out unrelated stray thoughts and listen to the story. Deal with stray thoughts later.
During night-time book reading, thoughts of things I need to do for work creep in. Wall up. I have a book to enjoy and I smile pleased with myself that I made time to read. Work will wait until morning. If I need to remember something, write it down and forget about it.
Work time arrives. Instead of I need to do this, this ‘n this — it’s, “What is the one thing I must do today?” (Zen Habits talks about this in detail.) I concentrate on making that happen as early in the day as possible. Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t.
Notice the theme? Focusing on the present. Block everything else and address them when the time is right. It’s not 100% foolproof. At times, I’ll falter especially when too much comes my way in a short time.
When life overwhelms you, how do you handle it? How do you manage worries and things piling on? What advice would you give to worriers?
Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2011 Meryl Evans
Ah, it’s Labor Day weekend. I’m keeping this short so I can unplug. and I hope you do, too.
Brain food…
And for fun because we’re allowed…
Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2011 Meryl Evans
I love schedule pickup and finding out my kids’ schedules, teachers and subjects even though I won’t know one teacher from the next. (Well, except my daughter happily got the same teacher again for math.)
I loved creating schedules like I did for high school and college. The only time it didn’t go well was during my freshman year of college. All the good courses were taken and I ended up taking a class that I wish I had never taken. I liked figuring out what courses I needed to satisfy my graduation requirements.
My daughter’s high school does it differently than mine did. She doesn’t get to pick her teachers. At my high school, seniors would go register first. Then juniors, and so on. We’d go into the cafeteria where the teachers were sitting by subject area and we’d go sign up with them. Of course, that wouldn’t work well in my daughter’s school of 2600 kids in 11th and 12th grade. Crazy.
The only thing I don’t know is who will be my youngest’ teacher. We’ll find out next week. That’s probably the most exciting one because I know many of the teachers at his elementary school. (We’ve been with this school since 2000 as the older two went through it.) He’s had a good track record in being assigned to the right teacher.
With schedule pick up comes buying school supplies, checking out spirit wear, joining PTA and going in shock in how much we’re spending in one week for all of this. And we didn’t have much spirit wear in high school. I had none in elementary or middle school. The only thing I had was a letter jacket. High school — I recall having a senior shirt, a sweatshirt for a senior girls’ group and a letter jacket. Yearbooks? That was a high school only thing.
And my parents had to shop for all of my school supplies. I’m grateful to the PTA for making that the easiest part of all this. The PTA works with school supply companies to order things in bulk. We just select the grade, write the check (of course, 3rd and 7th grade have the most expensive supplies in both schools!) and it’s done. Thank goodness, high school doesn’t have school supplies. The kids get what the teacher recommends or pickup what they need like folders, paper, writing instrument
I love back to school time. Yes, I do! It’ll be great to get back on a regular schedule. What’s your favorite thing about this time of the year?
Brain food…
For fun because we’re allowed…
Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2011 Meryl Evans